(Okay, the title of this post may be a bit confusing at first, but I'll get to that a little later :)
Since he didn't have much time last Monday, he got another email day on Friday AND I got to hear from him today!! How awesome is that? I also got a surprise email from him on Tuesday that was exactly what I needed to hear:
"Got a chance to email again because this whole zone conference thing going on, I just read some more emails and Ill email again Friday because we will have half a Pday.
Just wanted to let you know how much I appreciate and love you. I think about you constantly and just ah I want to tell you and show you everything. anyways. got to go but I love you :) stay strong babe. we can do this. Remember to look at the temple and think of the future when you are discouraged and think of US."
Ah where to begin.. there is so much to talk about from his emails! I guess I'll start with his mass email home on Friday. His mom asked him some questions about how it's been so far, and one of them was what the biggest surprise was on his mission. He said that it is how much he loves and enjoys the scriptures now. He's not the kind of person who likes reading of any kind, and he was never very consistent with his scripture study, but now he has a desire to read them and learn and study and grow. I thought that was really cool! Another thing he talked about was an 8-year-old girl named Tokelo who is preparing for baptism, and how he got to teach her about that. She even asked him to baptize her and I thought that was so cute and awesome!
"Something that I really liked and would like to share with you all is that it is a blessing to be loved. Some people go through life without a family, friends or anyone to tell them they are loved. It is sad to think that they believe no one loves them. God loves you! What an amazing blessing it is to know that simple truth that God is our loving Heavenly Father who loves you as an individual! Never think that no one doesn't get you, that no one is there for you, and especially that no one loves you. Those thoughts are not true and simply are not good for you physically, emotionally and spiritually! He loves you! He loves me! and how blessed are we to know that!
A quote I enjoyed was "if you can't stand it, kneel it." We all go through things that just seem unbearable, if you can't stand the trials you are going through, kneel down and pray for the strength. Something my companion Elder Jena likes to say is "Don't pray for a trial or struggle to go away but rather pray for the strength to go through it. It is from those challenges that we learn and grow." If we pray for them to go away then we will never learn."
I loved this because I've been praying a lot lately for my trials to go away, but in reality I should be praying to learn from it and become better.
They got Dominoes pizza, hahahaha
So now for the chicken thing :) In my email last week, I told him about how much I'm struggling with feeling like I fit in and I don't have many friends. My roommates leave me out and I just feel alone a lot of the time and I don't understand why it's always so hard for me to make friends, and this is what he said:
"I'm glad you are putting yourself out there and trying to make friends, like Gabe said you just need to give it time and things will work out in the end. I know how great of a person you are but I didn't always know that, remember how I asked who you were a couple times because I saw you in your Riverton jersey and asked you about what position you played and what not. I did it several times before I even got to know you. When I did finally get to know you, I learned that you were the most amazing person on the face of this planet and I quickly fell in love with you. It just takes time and most of the time people don't realize how great you are until they get to know you. You don't have the kind of flashy personality that makes friends instantly, you make friends that are real and true, that last, you aren't the girl who has a thousand friends and always texting everyone, you are far more sincere and loyal. Everyone has their own personality and some people just attract others instantly, some take time. but something that I think applies to anything is things that take time are usually better, I mean when you cook, the lower the heat and longer it cooks the better, for the most part haha. You aren't just a piece of chicken that was cooked quickly and looks great on the outside but when you take a bite the middle is still frozen. You are the piece of chicken that was cooked for a long time until it was perfect outside and in. You tend to find most people are impatient and want their chicken now, so they cook it too fast and it turns out looking great but then you find out it really isn't. just like the good chicken, it takes time. haha I don't know its just what was coming to my mind, that you are so amazing and it hurts me that people don't recognize it and realize it, but I do know that things will get better. I will always be there for you and I will always always always love you.
Something I have also learned is you never know who really looks up to you and admires you, I mean my own sister taylynne for example. I never know how much she cared about me, honestly I thought she would be happy I was gone but it was the complete opposite and that person was in my own family and I didn't even realize it. you never know who is watching you and being affected by your example so just keep doing good and good will come. The scriptures say it several times and many ways that what you do will come back to you so keep being as friendly to everyone you can because it does and will eventually come back to you :)"
So I started laughing really hard when he compared me to a piece of chicken... but then I realized, he's right. Why would I want to rush into a friendship that isn't true and sincere, when I could have an amazing friendship that lasts for a really long time? And then I started crying because it was exactly what I needed and he knows me so well.
"You would think me having a companion always would help make you feel not a lone but like you said no one gets me like you do, I find myself leaving a room to study by myself so I don't hear any noises that he is making haha. but its just hard not having someone you can be so completely honest and open with and it honestly just sucks not being able to see you or be with you or even hear your voice.
I am doing okay, its hard to forget yourself and lose yourself in the work but I am trying, I still think of you all the time and I hope I always do, yes it kinda makes it harder because it means i am always missing you but it also makes it so much better when I think of you, I dont know its weird.
I love you so much babe
Love
Elder Mookie"
Searching for people to teach in South Africa
What a goof
Flamingo lake again
So this is his companion, Elder Jena. He stole the CTR ring I got Mikel before he left and said that he's going to steal me from him hahaha
Now I will start with today's letters! Like I mentioned, I have been struggling with feeling like I fit in so what he said in the mass email was exactly what I needed again: "A thought I had this week was about being loved, or better yet, not being loved. Feeling like an outsider, someone who dosnt fit in. We have all felt like this before and we have all beaten ourselves up over it, made ourselves feel worthless and unwanted. we tend to feel like no one wants to be around us and everyone else has their groups that we dont fit into. We see others having fun, fitting in, making friends, and being "loved". Yet we feel unloved... We feel as if no one understands. What about Christ? Christ was an outcast, the very son of God was rejected. He didnt fit in either. Was it because he wasnt good enough? was it because he did something wrong? In fact it was quite the opposite. He was good enough, and he was doing good. We may be judged and feel left out because of the morally correct choices we make in our lives. We may stand out as we dont partake of the worldly things that people have to offer. we may be out casts by our friends and family but upholding to the standards and truths we strive to live.We may not fit in just because life is tuff and not everything goes our way, we might not feel apart of the group just because of who we are. So was Christ, He was cast out, left out, hurt, and beaten. Its not because you arnt good enough. Dont any of you ever feel like you arnt good enough. I can
promise that you are, and that you are loved, and if not by anyone here, Christ loves you. Is that not enough? Even Christs friend peter betrayed Him. Yet He carried on, He pushed through the hard times and now has a fullness of joy! Even when his friends rejected him and cast him out. I am sure he felt pretty sad about that and like he didnt fit in there. I am sure that has happend to some if not all of you, a friend all of the sudden leaving you out to dry. Push through the hard times in your life, get rid of the feelings of self doubt. Know that you are not alone and that you will never be alone. If no one else you have Christ, He knows what it feels like to not be accepted far better than you do yourself. He knows what it feels like to be made fun of, to be laughed at and hurt by those you care and love. He knows it all, He has felt it all. So pick you head up, look up and see the brightness of the day, see the good around you and feel the love that the Savior has to offer you. If you dont feel accepted, its not because you arnt good enough. Everyone goes through trials, some more than others. "the Lord gives his hardest trials to his strongest soldiers because He knows they can handle it." Put your shoulder to the wheel push a long. I love you all and pray that you dont feel discouraged or down on yourself. I can testify that things do get better as we put our trust and Faith to the Lord. All will work out in the end." Man I love him. It's amazing to see how he's maturing and growing and it's only been three months. His testimony is amazing and I'm so lucky to get to read it every week!
Nelson Mandela statue
He's the cutest.
Wild animals!
Shanties that many people live in where he is. We are so blessed!
In South Africa they do this thing called load shedding, where they turn off the power in certain areas for about 2 hours to save energy, and they happened to be the lucky ones one day. They were in the middle of cooking their lunch and the power went out hahaha, that would be awful.
His email to me today just made me laugh and miss him, so I'll just share it :)
"Friday sounds like quite the day, I am sorry the game didnt go your way. I know that you are still blaming yourself for the game also, just let it go. You have two more games this week and so we cant be thinking of the past game, we learn and look forward! :) I love you
Eish I am so glad you didnt go to that party!!! I cant beleive that someone pulled a gun! Im thankful your team is okay and I hope the football players are too. Im so thankful that you are in tune with the spirit and were able to recognize the promptings. The Lord is mindful of you and will protect and watch over you if you listen to what he has to say through the spirit. I love you so much!
Im glad you were able to go to church this week, I have been praying that you will be able to figure out a way to better manage everything you have on your plate so that you can be spiritually taken care of as well. I lauve you like crazy!
Man so your back started feeling better and last night It was hard to fall asleep because of how tight mine was haha, its my fault though, I havnt been rolling out so I guess I need to start doing that again haha. You are so beautiful, and I am lucky to love you!
So would you still love me if I came home fat haha, I looked at myself the other day and man that was depressing haha, I guess when you dont play soccer and exercise regularly you put on some pounds haha, I really need to start working out because at this rate Ill have to buy new pants haha. I think I have gotten a little bit taller as well because all my pants now seem to be short, I dont know if my waste got bigger so my pants are sitting higher or if I am growing upwards as much as I am outwards. I love your smile so much, I just look at my picture of you and instantly see the memories of us together, smiling at each other and making silly faces.
I remember what you said one time that when you get out of a relationship, when you start a new one it usually picks up where your last one left off. Its kind of the same thing I think you are going through. We are so close and would talk all the time and be with each other and when that suddenly leaves, You long for the same kind of relationship, being able to tell someone everything but there is no one you are that close with. Its supper hard but time will help :) I still struggle with wanting to talk about you but Jena gets annoyed and so does everyone else in the boarding. I still probably mention your name at least once a day if not more haha. I love you and will see you again, and we wont be separated again! <3
All of me, loves all of you
Elder North"
His Zone
Zulu tie he bought!
My little sister made him that keychain :)
He can cook!
Curtains in his boarding
His desk gets a little cluttered
Him and the other Elders he lives with
Mikel and Elder Razafindrakoto
Miss him like crazy, but we're almost to three months!
